Family & Home

What is the nature of friendship? The sheer complexity of this question has occupied me for years. I've been at USAChatNow for 5+ years now, heading towards 6, and I have had umpteen numbers of conversations on this very subject. For one, I know there is a certain group among you all that thinks that friendship online is different than friendship offline. To that I ask, can you define the difference to me? I know that when I name a person friend then I am no less concerned with their lives and how they are doing than I am with my "real life" friends. Mother in the hospital? I pray for her and you. Dog missing? I ask how the search is going. Having no luck finding a job? Would you like me to help with the search? I don't need to touch your skin in order for you and yours to have a place in my mind and heart. I have seen people come and I have seen people go at this site. Many have claimed to be true friends and then drop off the map after finding what they wanted, whatever that is despite hours upon hours of late night conversations while they were sobbing because their heart was just broken again and the inevitable "how on Earth am I ever going to find someone?" talks. Part cheerleader, part counselor, all friend. I've seen "friend" betray "friend" over the silliest of things. I can't tell you how many times I've heard "this time is the real deal, I'm in love". So if you can never be truly certain whom is a "true" friend and those that just mouth (or type, as the case may be) the words, then how can you really tell? Who is that one that will always hold out their hand whenever you fall when all others disappear despite saying they'd always be there for you? C'mon,you all know whom I'm talking about. Maybe not whom I may be specifically talking about but someone has done it to us all. So what is the answer? What is the Litmus test? So far I've only found one that works for me. Consistency. as you go through chat or life, simply look around you and spot the people in your life that are consistently there when things go wrong for you. Some people are there to help you every time and some are there mainly when it's convenient for them to be. Time after time. People that you watch screw over others again and again, it's merely a matter of time before you're next. Take a long hard look at those around you. Adding you to Facebook isn't the truth behind friendship. Don't think you're "besties" just because you got their phone number and text each other 50 times a day. The ones that step forward without thought of gain. Those that drop everything to reach out to you when you need them. They are the ones worth keeping to the end. It takes a little while to account someone to be a real friend. It takes effort. But to me, there is nothing like the effort made returned to you. It's cliche to say there is nothing quite like a true friend but honestly there really isn't. Can you identify those people around you? It may be worth taking a look around you at who is and isn't real. This site has been fabulous to me. Met many fine people. Some that will be my friend for the rest of my life. Some I'd rather forget. But I know the ones that are consistently there whenever I need them. I'm sure you can find them too if you look. And if you want to become a True friend then all you have to do is do what you say you will and just let your friends know that you'll stand with them at the Gates of Hell, by yourself if needs be. Well, that's just what I think.

I have spent a substantial amount of time perhaps too much time, contemplating the current social structure. For over 10 years I have observed the changes in this system and it makes me wonder. I am forced to wonder where we are headed as a “community”. I have many friends in my ‘community’. By community, I mean in my immediate neighborhood, neighboring neighborhoods, across my state, in other states, in other countries, both in person and online. I have in my 40 something years accrued hundreds of really great friends, some of which I would and could depend on in a moment’s notice, reciprocally. I notice I tend to surround myself with people living similar situations, all of us, never having ample time to get together face to face. We are busy parents of busy children living busy lives. All of us focused on living well, doing well, being well. Busy bringing up tomorrow’s leaders, right in our own homes. Our children are learning things years before they should, years before we could have. I remember Sunday dinners at grandma’s house. I remember holidays with family. I remember playing with the neighbor’s kids after school until the street lights came on. I remember the occasional late nights out playing flashlight tag with all the kids in the neighborhood. I remember driving to another state for thanksgiving with aunts and uncles. I remember a true sense of a living, breathing, touching community. I see many changes in this social system, some make me wonder exactly how it will turn out and some just make me worry. Our children are very driven, very educated, taught to be amazing adults but there is a cost. That cost is community. That cost is their childhood. I see many children in school all day, sitting at a desk all night. They struggle to find time for themselves let alone for others. Our children do the best they can with the little social practice they are exposed to. Unfortunately, not all exposure is beneficial. Some children have greater insecurities and/or challenges regarding social graces which were so important when we, their parents grew up. This generation, perhaps, the first of the generations dealing with the social withdrawal we see going on in the world. I heard it said once, a few years back, that our sons and daughters with Autism Spectrum Disorders would be the few individuals, the likely, only group to feel no pain over the lack of social networking in person. In this arena, they will excel. However for the rest of us, those that need to be physically in other's company, we will have a dramatic rise in depression. As Sunday dinner at grandma's house lends to video conferencing from states and even countries away, we are reminded that as our contacts have become worldwide; our community has become ever decreasingly smaller. I wonder where this will lead us, tomorrow. I wonder can we bridge the gap between worldwide contacts and community. I wonder do online relationships fill the gap left by the current social structure and its lack of time and person to person networking, or, does it feed it. I wonder. I wonder, what do you think?

Alot of yall know me as rick320 and yall know alot of the bad side of me but dont know the struggles i try to overcome on a daily basis. I brought alot of myself and regret that. Ive overcome 5 years in prison for a mistake i live with everyday and have fought and fought to get my son which is my life and I have finally gotten custody of him. I find changes happenin in my life everyday as a result of wantin to be the best dad I can so I am very blessed in my efforts. I will say this site has allowed me to vent anger, frustration and joy at same time. I have made some awesome friends here and they have helped me to overcome addictions and trials. Im writing this blog to gain a vip status but all is well if i dont win cause yall will still know the feelings i go through. Life is a game and has to be played good or you will lose. I feel as if the score is even right now and I will take the lead cause I have the confidence from my good friends here and my son and my girl to get me through the hard times. When I was 20 years old I killed a 22 year old girl drunk driving, that is the one thing I struggle with everyday cause the real Rick that most dont know is a very caring and nice guy with a bad temper as you tears have seen, lol. Im workin on that but that night haunts me to this day. Im not writing this to get sympathy or anything like that but this gives me the chance to talk bout my story and mabye positive things can come from this. Life is a struggle for everyone these days and people all alike deal with similar situations and I give alot of credit to the ones that can handle diversity in life without indulging in drugs or drinking as I have. I will make it. I will survive. I will overcome this and be the man I once was and get my life back and give my son the life he needs and deserves. This is my desire, my fire and my passion to keep moving forward in life. I have my girl who is so supportive of me and shows me more love than any other woman I've ever been with. I love her so much and can't thank her enough for what she has shown me. God sends help in so many diff forms that if you have your eyes closed you will miss the chance he is giving you. I have done that for so many years, feeling sorry for myself n having self pitty. That dont cut it in order to have a successful and fullfilling life. Anyway I appreciate this chance to vent and get alot of this off my chest, even if i dont get one it helped me more than you know cause i dont talk bout this to anyone. Everyone needs to step back, take a breath and remember to enjoy the little things in life instead of being stressed about the big things that ruin the world to begin with, mostly money. Well thank yall for letting me write this blog and hope yall enjoy reading it.

Do you think you are a very shy person and you cannot make new friends? Do not worry, you are not alone there are hundreds of people like you, but the good news is that you too can easily make friends and enjoy the company of large host of friends. Are you wondering how it is possible? Do not worry, you just need to visit a community site or a social networking site and use the online chat rooms to make new friends. hundreds of people like you are looking for company and for friends online.

One of the reasons why many people find it hard to make new friends is because they are too preoccupied or over conscious about their own appearance and their own looks. If this sounds like you, do not worry with online chat you will not face such problems. You can remain anonymous online still make friends. All that you need is a chat name in a good network.

You can initiate contact with as many people as you like. In these networks you can easily find friends and people that share the same interests. You will not have to complain about not finding people that share the same interests anymore. People with varied interests visit and use these networks and within a short time you will be able to have a large network of friends. However, if you want to establish long term friendship with people on the internet you have to go online regularly so that you will be able to keep in touch with the other members. One of the best things here is that others will not know how you look and they do not care what you are doing and how much money you are making etc.

You can afford to be yourself in the chat rooms without having to wear any masks that you normally wear. If you want to be naughty in the chat rooms you can be and if you want to flirt a bit, then you can. You will be able to have a lot of fun and excitement. You do not have to visit any discos or bars and spend a lot of money to meet friends. You will be able to enjoy the company of interesting people anytime of the day or night right from your home. You can enjoy the privacy of your home and interact with people from different parts of the country. You will be able to learn a lot of new things by interacting with new people.

It is also possible for you to go on video chat and audio chat these days. If you are comfortable going on webcam online you will be able to have more intimate chats with your friends online. You are free to reveal only as much information as you like to the other person. So you will be in full control and still enjoy having a lot of friends.